I’m back after a one week break! Thanks for understanding if you did.
It has been 2 weeks, missing my sister, because I have to wash all the dishes myself, haha. BUT WE DON’T HAVE TO NOW 😀
It has also been a week of my mother telling me random good qualities about myself.
Since last week, she has told me that I’m wonderfully generous (first thing in the morning with a hug), gentle and nice, sweet and lovingly kind, thoughtful and caring. All with the highest form of sincerity a mother can give.
I feel like I could rest in peace tonight with a smile on my face just thinking about it.
So here are some things that I would like to thank my mother for! (I haven’t told her, but I’m writing it down for future reference)
- Thanks for inserting random pieces of wisdom in all your scoldings
“Cooking the rice for half an hour is still useless if you can’t eat it”– for the times I told her I’ve tried my best .
“diamonds can’t shine if it’s not cut and polished”– for the times I told her I don’t understand why I have to work so hard and suffer so much. (Fun fact: She took me to see the late K. Sri Dhammananda, who then gave me a pali name meaning diamond… hence this the repeated saying of this phrase to the point of frustration…mine of course.)
“I don’t need you to get all A’s, but I want you to try your best and work hard” – for the times where I under-performed during trial exams, then decide to surprise everyone with AAAAAAAAAsian results. Until SPM came, when I decided to take the Chinese language examination for the first time in my life, with just tuition classes.
Rough, but I got a C+ fam! 😀 okayokay…focus.
- Thanks for showing me that love is really hard and full of suffering but possible.
Turning 60 this year, my father has a head full of hair that’s still mostly black, thanks to my mom and her numerous miracle chinese soups and drinks.
While my dad has the most annoying witty ass on the planet, with humor so quick and sharp to make you cringe in fear, my mother takes it bravely(not quietly)…but she takes it, and still cares for him.
He might be intelligent, talented and studded with good qualities, he is full of flaws. My mom has lived with it for nearly 40 years. Through every tear and wound he had inflicted upon her, mentally and physically.
And then she had to put up with this witty ass man’s daughter for another 20 years. She admits that she caned me the most. (those rotans use to mysteriously disappear…like my homework)
The times when I told her, I don’t wanna get married, I just wanna live alone with dogs….were just times where I saw how much love hurt her, and I still don’t know if I’ll ever love anyone as much as her.
She also admits that there were times in her life where she just wanted to leave me alone to manifest my monstrous qualities. But ultimately she didn’t want me to suffer in life so yeah. Love is awesome.
- Thanks for bringing us to forest and giving us a few sets of encyclopedias to read!
Before Google, encyclopedias were awesome. We used to have one set with Snoopy comics in it (second hand from an aunt or uncle somewhere), and one with everything about body parts. (my friends thought I was lying when I said we had white blood cells in primary school…like bij wad..blood is red u noobz)
She studied botany in university and got first class honors and stuff, so whenever we went to FRIM, she’d be quizzing us on what tree is this, what flower is this, which family has this formation of growth etc.
She used to bring us to the waterfall or lake gardens and we’d have picnics there. That was bomb.
- Thanks for giving me all that scolding and critique. My friend and I got scolded by a teacher once. Long story short, she was full of tears and I was poker face like…m8, I have it worst at home.. fait me.
- Thanks for paying for allll those extra knowledge.
The last time I checked, people who didn’t learn piano, erhu, french, japanese, and ballet were still alive and healthy. But you just decided, Hey! Let’s put you in all these creativity-inducing lessons and let you have so much fun and suffering! Why?
- Thanks for showing me that happiness is the most important thing in life.
All the stories and experiences that you’ve had, all the tears and screaming, all the fear and stress, all the years of suffering etched on the lines on your face, suddenly disappear when you smile.
It reminds me of the times that you’d turn on your favorite song while we dance and jump around together.
It reminds me of how you say you love yellow roses like it was given to you yesterday.
It reminds me of how you hug me and say everything is fine while I break down.
It reminds me of how much I owe every eloquent sentence, every stroke of art, every lighthearted jest, every grace and wisdom to such a beautiful woman like you.
She doesn’t think it’s the best picture of her, but it’s my favorite candid shot cause she looked so daring and elegant at the same time. To be fair, my mom was really beautiful, had half the school after her with the longest straight locks of thick black hair (before she cut it in this shot) that she gave passed on to me. ❤